Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
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She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
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whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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