ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
