im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize