According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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