they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
