I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize