Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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