my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I just threw up on my dentist
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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