She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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