HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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