Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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