so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
