Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
