dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'