I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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