i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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