She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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