I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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