what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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