Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I love you. Go after that dick
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
