Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
