I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize