You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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