dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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