I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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