For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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