I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
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Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
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think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.