we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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