i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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