not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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