I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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