Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
