Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router