everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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