if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
