let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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