Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
