i think i have two assholes
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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