i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
