Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is wine microwaveable?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I fill condoms, not promises.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize