belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
