i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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