Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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