he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize