do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
