so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
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