Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
two words: eviction party
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize