I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone says I win the strip club
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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