just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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