This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Someone signed my nipple.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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