I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
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You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
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There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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