We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
