u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
